The Naughty Step

Three cheers for the naughty step!!
I have moaned on here over the past few months about Baby Wild being renamed The Terrorist due to her propensity for throwing earsplitting tantrums at will.  They truly were just awful, emotionally charged, anger fuelled and exhausting for both of us.  But as most things are with young children, they were mostly a phase.  I hate when folk offer advice saying "don't worry - it's just a phase".  Agh!  I know that thanks very much, what I'm asking you to help me with though is dealing with this part of the phase please!  God and it was so much worse in public, I didn't take her out in public for a month or so if it could be helped for fear of the mortification of people observing that I couldn't control such a wild child.

So we started using the naughty step, which in our house is just the door mat at the front door.  And it worked! Almost immediately!  I realise that it isn't going to work for every kid, but it is worth a try.  As long as you stick to the basic rules and follow through to completion every time as it's all about consistency. 
It starts with a warning that if the child continues to misbehave they will go to the step (wherever that may be in your house).  Explain why their behaviour is unacceptable, and make sure that there are no other issues at play here which could easily solve the problem immediately such as hunger, pain or sickness, tiredness etc.  If they still continue to act up, take them to the step, get down to their height & explain again why they are there, and how long they will have to wait it out there.  Amazingly, Baby Wild has always obeyed and stayed put on the step, despite a few violent kicking and wailing tantrums on the step in the early days!  We only make her stay there for one or two minutes as she's so little, but despite her age she understands why she's there and our reasoning.  After the time is up, and the child has calmed down, repeat the type of behavior you would prefer and again explain why she was there before offering hugs and kisses to show there's no bad feeling and all is well.  Oh, and try to get them to apologize - easier said than done with a child as stubborn as mine!  For more on the naughty step technique see Super Nanny's advice.

After employing the step for about 2 months now, we need to use it less and less.  There are days where TT just seems to be in a foul mood, and I'm too busy to take us both out and about as a distraction and the naughty step looms more threateningly on such days!  But mostly, when she starts to act up now, I ask her if she would like to go to the naughty step, for if not she must change her behavior instantly.  Cue a moment of sulking, but mostly she understands and stops the misbehaviour.  Makes life a hell of a lot easier for all of us, and we're all much happier as a result.

Of course, I also have to factor in that every day she is learning new words and starting to build bigger sentances so the sheer frustration of not being able to communicate what she wants is dissipating and which is a huge contributing factor to toddler tantrums.  You could argue that she's just growing out of 'the phase', but I know that cheeky mischievous gleam in her eye when she knows that what she's scheming might get her into trouble, and I know that the step will sort it out!

Does the naughty step work in your house?  I'd love to hear if you have any other tricks!