Oh my god I hated every minute of breastfeeding. I was not one of those fortunate ladies who take to it instantly, and find it a bonding and loving experience. No sir! It was pain all the way! But being a stubborn and determined mama, I stuck it out for as long as I could... which was only 6 weeks in my case.
I would never had lasted that long without a whole army of support. I'm not exaggerating - I had a breastfeeding 'buddy' who was at the end of the phone with advice and would visit for moral support (!), attended the local breastfeeding club - although that was mostly for the free lunch and to try make new friends (I didn't), and of course I had the bossy midwives visiting to help out. Making it to the breastfeeding club by lunchtime on a Thursday always felt like such a miraculous triumph & achievement! Although I found the staff intimidating, it was so useful and encouraging too, especially since I struggled so much.
But the crucial point came when my favourite mid wive came to visit one day and I broke down in tears with exhaustion and pain. Taking pity on me she shared the best 2 tips I have. The first one was how to get baby to sleep on her own. The second was possibly controversial, but a total life saver in my case - that you can top up breastfeeding with bottle feeding! Wow! SO simple, why had no-one shared this with me before?! Because the other midwives insisted that once baby had fed from a bottle she'd never go back to breast (it's apparently more difficult - like a hungry baby cares!) and that all my milk would instantly dry up and vanish! Bollocks to that. That night was the first time any of us got some decent sleep since the birth. Baby Wild had a full belly for the first time, and was tricked into thinking she sleeping on Daddy Native's chest, and I was a whole world calmer.
The point of this is simple - don't be afraid to work out what works for you. The 'professionals' aren't always right and can't know what's right for you individually. There are no rules, throw away the books and follow your instinct - you know you're doing all you can the best you can for baby, and therefore she's going to be fine!
